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Brangelina to accelerate adoption binge
 By
Chris Elliott and John Breneman
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie plan to adopt a child from each
of the nations of the Pacific Rim, according to the underground
newspaper Brangelina Today.
The Pitt-Jolie child-raising dynamo intends to go alphabetically
starting with Brunei, Cambodia, Chile and Colombia and ending
some time in 2012 with Taiwan, Thailand and Vietnam -- averaging
seven per year as they expand their brood from six children
to a whopping 32.
"I sure hope Brad doesn't end up banging the Vietnamese
child like Woody Allen did," said Jolie. "Maybe
we'll adopt a boy from Hanoi."
While technically part of the Pacific Rim, the two intend
not to adopt from Australia, Russia, Canada or the United
States because those don't sound like poor countries. Pitt
was recently overheard discussing the duo's parenthood plan
with pal George Clooney on the set of "Ocean's Whatever."
"What kid wouldn't be psyched about getting yanked out
of a festering pisshole like North Korea and being raised
in luxury by movie-star parents," he said. "And
by parents, of course, I mean a team of nannies."
Brangelina's own biological children will not receive special
treatment. "Each will receive the Lamborghini of their
choice on their 16th birthday and have a teaching hospital
bearing their name in their country of origin," said
a source close to Jolie's lip stylist.
Mom to Shiloh, Knox and Vivienne (biological) Maddox, Pax
and Zahara (adopted), the gorgeous Golden Global U.N. Goodwill
ambassador is eager to expand her mini melting pot.
And the Rumor Gazette has obtained a list of possible names
for upcoming adoptees, including: Oskar, Tats, Floyd, Lara
Croft, Mombassa, Thelma, Wheezy, Rusty and Smitty.
 Also,
Pitt and Jolie may or may not be in negotiations to film a
reality TV show called "The Brangy Bunch."
Michael Jackson could not be reached for comment.
Related story:
Pitt
split: world mourns Brad-Jen apocalypse
Posted on September 22, 2008 5:08 PM
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