This
just in from sister publication Jacko
Digest:
Jacko
Digest reports: Stone-dead Michael Jackson killed
at the American Music Awards, winning four pointy plastic
phallic symbols for the mantle at his multimillion-dollar
hyperbaric burial chamber in Jackson Hole.
As media e-jacko-lation ensues, the nation's leading jacko-logists
estimate $1.2 trillion in jacko-nomic impact.
Pretty young thing Taylor Swift, who beat Dead Jacko for
Artist of the Year, said: "To even be mentioned in a
category with Michael Jackson, who we will miss and love forever,
is both an unimaginable honor and a little creepy." Kanye
West could not be reached for a pompous self-aggrandizing
comment.
In other highlights Lady Gaga performed at a flaming piano,
"in honor of that time Michael's hair caught on fire."
