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« Romney apologizes for anti-tar baby rhetoric | Page One | Hamsters banned from planes »

Bush fails second doping test

By John Breneman

Now that a second test has confirmed that his blood contained high levels of artificial testosterone, President Bush faces the possibility he could be stripped of his cherished "World's Greatest President" belt buckle.

Today's disclosure by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency also raises new questions about his controversial 2004 victory over rival bicycling pantload John Kerry.

Bush has long denied the use of performance-enhancing drugs, saying he quit back in 1986 when he gave up the booze and blow. But experts believe there is widespread cheating at the highest levels of geopolitical competition.

For example, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is said to be hooked on a cocktail of steroids, opium-laced hashish and camel growth hormone; Kim Jong Il on Viagra and Courvoisier. Hezbollah boss Hassan Nasrallah has a wicked crystal meth habit and Saddam Hussein was a mustard gas freak.

Sources say Bush is fixing to challenge Ahmadinejad and Nasrallah to a no-holds-barred, Texas-style mountain bike race.

Related stories:
Bonds rages against steroid allegations -- March 8, 2006

Incredible Hulk implicated in steroid probe -- March 18, 2005

Canseco claims he did steroids with Bush -- Feb. 14, 2005

Santa Claus denies use of steroids -- Dec. 25, 2004

Steroids infiltrating Washington, Wall St.

Posted on August 9, 2006 9:54 PM | Permalink

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